It seems as if I'm stuck inside some kind of blog self-consciousness. Yesterday, I discussed the blog's superpowers and the way that merely reading it grants the reader a kind of supernatural protection akin to the proetection a middle school bully might provide in exchange for lunch money.
Today, I want to discuss hatred of the blog and me. It's been an interesting week in terms of the number of times I've read about people hating me. I should definitely note here that the blog gets way more support than hatred, and I have tried to repeatedly make mention of how grateful I am for your support. I am. Grateful.
Nonetheless, a wave of Wind In Your Vagina hatred is spreading. And I wanted to write about it. Because I was trying to write about my daughter having night terrors and wearing tap shoes (CLAP CLAP TAP AHHHHHHHHHHHH), but my heart wasn't in it.
First, I need to tell you that it's jarring how casually people are on the internet when it comes to saying "I hate you". It's jarring and weird. It's weird to the extent that it feels so unreal. It's like: you hate me? What? Wait a second. Huh?
I hate you because you talk about kids.
I hate you because your blog sucks.
I hate you because you write well.
I hate you because you're a jerk.
I hate you because all you said on my blog was "Thanks for reading".
I hate you because you don't comment on my blog.
And then a little fact drifts in that alters the jarring weird unreality into a form of hilarity: These are grown up people. These are grown ups and they're acting like Lucy when she skips her nap. Can you imagine? I have a pretty good imagination and I can't even fucking imagine.
Let's put this in context. I'm just a dude. I have a computer. I start writing about my kids. And the currently relevant philosophical issue of facts being fictions and fictions being facts. That is all. I have written my thing. I have been clear about what that thing is: a blur or fantasy and reality. And you hate what?
I'm not bitching or complaining. I'm in awe. The phenomenon awes me. People send me nasty email. They leave nasty comments ON MY BLOG. They write entire nasty posts on their blogs. And, like I said, this all flared up in the last 7 days. It's completely trippy. My mouth hangs open. I'm like: You hate me? Really?
If you read my Dooce stuff (2 posts out of more than 100), it's almost impossible not to realize that they're complete and utter jokes. So I re-read a lot of this junk because I think: they must be joking, right? And they're not. People hate me. And I'm sorry if I'm being repetitive but I just can't wrap my head around it. I can't get my head around what it might mean to hate a blogger. There's so many cool things to hate. And some people hate bloggers? What does it mean when someone leaves a nasty comment on a blog? What is that? Again, not whining - but asking from a serious curiosity like I'm looking at something freaky at a museum. What the hell is that?
The worst comment on a blog I ever left was a challenge to play Jon Armstrong in a game of basketball. And I meant it. I would take him to the hole.
Anyway, I'm sorry this post goes nowhere. I took a morning to just be in awe of the hatred I inspire. My apologies to the people who don't hate me. It's just a new thing and apparently I'll have to get used to it. It's jarring and weird, but I have to admit that it does feel kinda gangsterish and cool. Black Hockey Jesus. Feared and hated blogger. It's just so stupid. And perfect.
See you tomorrow. ~BHJ
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172 comments:
This is the first I've heard of hatred towards you. You're the shit according to what I've seen, and shit is meant in the nice way, not the.. you get it.
I keep reading because I like the way you think, even if it does go off the tracks a bit.
Even if you don't read my site, I'm still a fan.
Even if you don't mention me in an aside, I'm still a fan.
Even if I'm not on your blogroll (Dude, you should put me on your blogroll), I'm still a fan.
So, let me be the first to say "Huzzah!" to you, and let me be the first to remind you to take your meds. :-)
Damn. I've been trying to get haters for four years now without luck. It's always the blogs that are innocuous and fun that get the most hate mail. (Another example is blogography.com - he gets more than anyone I've ever met.)
People feel a safety to act childish and a freedom to be nasty on the internet that they don't feel in real life. That's all. If you can remember that and manage to take it all with a grain of salt and remember that it usually stems out of the less admirable human traits like jealousy and selfishness, you will be better off.
Also? I like reading your site because you seem to be in so much better touch with your imagination that most adults I know and you tell your stories in such a touching and humourous way. I'm glad you're not going to stop writing because of few random haters!
Delurking to tell you that I don't hate you either.
I don't think you need to read my blog because I haven't updated in a month, maybe more.
Please don't put me on your blogroll because I am not that interesting.
You have made me laugh out loud more that Chag (sorry, Chag) and he was the blogger who told me to read you).
Well, I don't know shit, but I have a theory.
You've been very open about the fact that you want to be a popular blog, whether you're kidding or not. The whole "like me" game comes with the "hate you". That's just the way it is, I think, right or wrong.
I want people to read my blog and I want people to like my blog, but I don't tell people that. So I have a few readers and none of them worships me and I get a few thoughtful comments of people riffing off what I said or just saying, "Hello."
Wow, I'm rambling.
With marketing and selling comes hatred. People hate to be sold to.
Also this: Many people don't grow up, they just get old.
But, like I said, I don't know shit.
Hello, Black Hockey Jesus.
What is it? Time of year, something in the air or water? Comments to Stefanie on her blog are also pretty hateful!! Hoping to get back to seeing the humor and letting the hate die. Thought the perpose was to entertain not create wars on blogs...heard it said before and agree.... If you don't partcularily like what is being said or how a person writes, move on...don't continue to be nasty and try to see who is entertained and who wants to jump on a your hate bandwagon.
about 30% of the comments on my blog are from people hating on me for not being religious anymore and being an atheist, for destroying the jewish people by marrying my non-jewish boyfriend, for destroying my family (apparently) because I'm not super religious and am marrying said boyfriend, and also cause atheists all have abortions and are sex maniacs, according to one particularly crazy dude.
I just laugh at how hilariously wrong they are, and try not to leak any personal information so they can't hunt me down.
i don't expect shit from you except a good read.
i love your blog. i never comment cause i'm too lazy. i don't much care if you read me or link me as my blog is pretty ordinary and mostly random thoughts that i need to spit out. (except that i never spit cause i'm a lady. ) i think hatred is a sign that you called people's attentions, and some people didn't like what they saw, or how that made them feel. there's all sorts out there and i actually think it's hilarious that someone will take the time to post about hating a blog. wish i had that amount of free time.
(see, random thoughts even in this comment...)
I don't understand that phenomenon either..I don't get spending valuable time and energy bitching at a blogger if you disagree. Don't get me wrong, I like to debate stuff..I like to go to political places and get in a good word fight, but this is different. It's taking someone whom you don't really know and you've never really met and taking fascination a step too far in the wrong direction. It worries me that these people need what they get out of screwing with people they don't even know.
Oh, and P.S.- I hate you. lol.
they have to get it out of their system somehow...better a quick troll than a blast of sub machine gun fire I always say... just as long as one doesnt lead to the other...o no...my blog is not anon.. but I am a long way away, where no one speaks english phew
I don't have any words of wisdom for you BHJ. I don't really understand the purpose of leaving the hate messages. It is indeed a strange phenomenon.
You rock BHJ - the rest are just haters.
That shit's not on.
Have some totally non-gay man love from darkest Ireland.
hahaha I was gonna say I hated you for your strange cafepress shirts, but then I saw the "got wind" thong and just started giggling because if I wear that thong I won't have wind in my vagina and then I'd hate you more because you took my wind away
and on that note I'm off to try to locate a few more uppercase letters and maybe a random punctuation mark which I purposely left off to make my comment less intelligible because when i read your blog I usually have to read the posts twice to figure out your point so it only seems fair
i'm bummed that you have to defend yourself, or feel like you have too. one anonymous comment, in which i was basically called a bad mother, actually made me cry. and i only like to cry at sad movies. or from laughing.
i for one am glad you're a dude with a computer.
that's all.
I don't hate you. I'm pretty much just the quiet girl who sits in the back of the class and taking it all in. Sometimes I raise my hand. Sometimes I mutter the answer while others around me raise theirs. But I'm reading, and I don't hate the story or author.
Kids don't have a lock on immaturity.
Want to borrow one of my green pens? They have powers of happiness.
It's the anonymous aspect of the internet - like flipping off another driver. Normally civilized people who would never flip off or hate-on someone the know, feel free to do it from the relative safety of their car/computer.
If they hate your writing so much, they could just look away.
Feels good to know that your writing has that much power to influence behavior, eh?
The whole world of the Internets and the anonymity it provides is all very weird. I've seen some strange stuff go down.
H8ers (I really wanted to write that!) come w/ being famous!! Don't let it get to you.
Looking forward to hearing about Lucy's tap shoes and night terrors.
Just a little note to say ... I dont's hate you.
I think you are funny as well..
Hang in there... got go snoop now... find them haters....
People are weird. And frankly, you are sorta weird too, BHJ, but that's why I love reading you. Sometimes I have to re-read a post a couple of times to figure out what the hell you are talking about, and occasionally I have to google something you've referenced for clarification, but hey, I love ya!
You're so good at this, it's hard to remember you're just a blogbaby.
What Avitable said though, it took me almost 2 years to get an anonymous "I hate you" comment. And THAT was for a comment I left on someone else's blog. It wasn't even about MY blog. Freaked me out for days.
My only argument with your blog is that I can't tell what's real and what's not and sometimes I feel like I've wasted 10 minutes reading it. But hey, I probably would have just spent those 10 minutes trying to figure out what Dooce's dog Chuck is really thinking when she puts those wigs on him. So it's all good.
I don't think I will ever understand the hatred in the blog world. Why? Why bother? It's the freaking internet. How about close the website and never return? Why do people feel the need to seek out those they dislike?
I like you. I only like the cool people, so congrats!
Hatred? Bah. Maybe it's true what they say: any publicity is good publicity?
Oh. my. god. I just wrote you the longest comment and my 10-month-old daughter hit the backspace button, like, a gazillion times right as I was about to click "Publish Your Comment" and poof! It's gone.
Argh!
It was something to the effect of you're creative and unique, seventh-grade mentality, different = scary = bad, people with no lives, insecurity, threatened, hiding behind anonymity, trying to stir up trouble because their lives are so lame, so not worth your time or energy, blah, blah, blah, general ramblings of support and love.
Loyalty, new favorite blogger, internal battle between not wanting to give these losers more attention/traffic and really wanting to see what they wrote about you. A whole blog post about hating you? Seriously? Isn't that just so transparently lame? Even to themselves? Sharing your awe and curiosity at the bizarre and surreality of it all.
Got your back.
well, I sure like you. just practice my mantra "dooblehvay" it means w in french and is very good to use for "whatever"
I'm thinking that most of these people just don't understand you. Their incapacity to follow your train of thought must be your fault, right?
Love ya!
My only words of wisdom? Fuck 'em all and rock on.
Again, I read because it's entertaining. If someone takes the time to "hate", then they really are just wasting their time (and yours). I know you weren't fishing for compliments, but you're just that good :)
Let them go. And if someone takes the time to read their hateful posts about you but they don't bother to let THEM know it, I think that's a win for you. It just gets curiouser and curiouser around here.
And, I can't wait to read about night terrors and tap shoes. Our Oldest Boy used to get night terrors but then we linked it to his ingestion of aspartame (nutrasweet) and all has been good since then. Aspartame = evil. Trust me. Let her eat sugar.
I have to say I have not seen or felt the hatred toward you. What I have seen is quite a bit of admiration for your writing.
Apparently I haven't been blogging long enough to feel the hatred of the internets. I am surprised because a lot of people have strong feelings about what I blog about. I thought for sure I would have at least one hater. Of course, I have only done 25 posts so I am still a baby. Maybe haters will come.
Keep trucking, I think the people who can take a joke will continue to read.
Well, you know, these are people older than 25, grown up is debatable. Hate sucks and for a blog is weird and jarring and pointless. Sorry it's happening. Hope you'll let it slide off. I truly enjoy your writing.
I think "they" are just using the wrong word?? Maybe "they" should keep to open discussions about disagreeing what you write or not comment at all? Just wait, two years from now there will be so many blogs (every household will have one) none of us will be able to get through the day because there will be too many to read.
Keep on, Keepin on BHJ!
Happy Thursday!
- Jennifer
So I'm sitting here with my head in my hands (well, not really, because I'm typing) trying to think how best to respond, where best to respond, I've got your email open, I've got this post open, I've got that other post open, and my heart hurts. It just hurts.
This is my greatest fear. This is the thing nobody told me when I started blogging. This is the thing I spend hours, HOURS at my computer trying to avoid. This is, in my opinion, the blogosphere at its ugliest.
I think calling another blogger out on one's blog is the un-classiest thing a person can do. I'm all for venting, for free speech, for sharing opinions, for sparking discussion, but I draw the line at public humiliation. It says far more about the person saying it than the person they're saying it about.
We all want readers. We all want commenters. We all want to be heard and validated and loved. I appreciate this as much (if not more) than the next guy, and so I allow myself to get caught up in so many amazing people's lives. I try to keep up and my Reader is bursting and I comment as much as I can because I *do* care, OMG how I care, not just about having people visit my blog but also about the individual people who blog and their lives and I become invested in each one -- but then what? What about my kids? My job? My husband? My friends? My groceries? My house? My life? And even if I neglect all those things, someone out there will still be inadvertently left out. I'll still be hurting somebody.
You know I love you - but then again, you comment on mine so maybe I can't identify with the people hating you right now. That said, there are some blogs I comment on that will never read me, I know that, and I don't hate. And everyone's perception of who the Great Bloggers are is different, and wildly skewed, in my opinion. And if it means THIS MUCH to you, people, ask yourself why. Don't call out other people - ask yourself why you're hating.
I don't know what to say that's going to make a difference so I'm just gonna cut it off here.
[head back in hands]
HOLY FUCKING COMMENT, BATMAN.
(sorry) :(
It worries me that there are people out there acting normal in everyday life who then go home and spew hatred and venom. I guess the internet is a good outlet if it stays there, but it's hard to believe that such toxic emotion can be contained enough for release only through the fingertips.
Mean people are scary, sorry for your angst.
*sigh* I always miss all the drama. No idea who or what you're talking about but no matter. At least you're inspiring passion, whether hatred or adoration.
Jealousy=Hate. It's that simple. The ones that aren't mature enough to turn it inward and improve themselves will try and destroy you instead.
The only people I hate I wouldn't spend time going to their blogs let alone leaving them comments. The people that do that are not right in the head. I mean think how off kilter you have to be to actually read an entire post and then take the time to post that you hate them. Makes no sense and I will never understand it.
I think your haters are neurotic. They have inner frustrations that they manifest outward at you in the form of hate. Maybe they are just frustrated that you actually have blog traffic...just a theory.
They are jealous plain and simple. They have smaller than average junk and assume that a guy thats writes stuff like you do has huge junk...like 70's porno sized junk... like they need to invent a size rubber bigger than Magnum junk.... So they dont hate you they hate your man junk.
Maggie Dammit! Leave a book why don't you! :P
I invite hate, and rarely get any. That sucks. Kinda like what Avitable said.
I've never heard/seen anyone say anything except positive things about you. I agree with them. I don't really care if you read me - that's not what I'm here for you, you know? I'm here because I think your blog, and it's unique mix of myth and reality is amazing, and original, and all the things that majority of the other blogs in the blogosphere aren't.
People only hate you because everyone else loves you. It's not personal towards you, it's personal inside of them. Jealousy will eat away at the core of mother fuckers until they have no choice but to spew their vitriolic bullshit at those that don't deserve it.
You're the brunt of someone else's self disappointment and anger. That makes you a pretty big deal. :)
There Maggie: that's how to leave a short story. Dammit. ♥
Wasn't it somewhere on your blog that the cool term "Hatorade" was born? I think we all need to step back and get a reality check from time to time. It's so funny that I clicked over here before writing my post today and I'm glad I did. Mine was going to be on this very thing.
There are haters and then there are haters. There really is a difference BHJ and sometimes finding the blurry line between the two can be difficult.
The haters are jealous little bastards or people that you hurt for one reason or another. They aren't to be feared but more sympathy and understanding may be needed. They aren't really haters either - they are just people that would like more from you than you are willing to give and you have to come to a point of understanding that you know they're going to call you out - whether here in comments or on their blog. It's your choice how to register, understand, and respond to this. You can't change anyone but you can change yourself. Differences can be made but how is the key.
Haters are people that seriously need psychological help. There is not one person that will be loved by everyone and not everyone will love you. But those that cross a line in to the wierd and dangerous are the ones that you need to keep your eye on the most. They drink Hatorade by the gallon and they thirst for more even as they have more cooling. They feed on their anger and let it build until they explode. It's those people that concern me more than just a Hater that is jealous or hurt.
This has gotten long and winded (but not in a vagina kinda way) but I just wanted to say that while you've never commented on my blog I will continue to read you because you inspire me in a very off - beat kind of way. You're wierd, wired, and crazy. Just my kinda guy. :)
PS Those Haters fear Kool Aid because it dilutes the Hatorade. Pour some Kool Aid on them. :D
I don't hate you. I don't always GET you, but I just sit here, looking confused, saying "Huh, well, uh, ok," before moving along to the next blog.
I don't get the hate. Dislike, maybe, I could see, but hate seems a bit strong for words in the ether. Words that are sometimes funny, sometimes emotional and sometimes just plain weird.
If they really do hate you so much, why not just click the box with the X in it, up there in the corner? Easy peasy.
Some people just never make it past high school. I think a lot of it is how fast your site became so popular. Suck it up, haters, the man has talent. And bitching because you didn't leave a comment? For real?
Boo hoo, BHJ didn't leave me a comment AGAIN today! I don't think he loves me. I hate him!!!
Grow up.
I don't hate you. :) It's easy to hid behind the anonymity of the internet to be hateful to people. I guess it sounds old fashioned, but why the hell can't people just shut their yap if they don't have something nice to say? I feel sorry for the pathetic folks who have to fan their own flames to get some sense of validation - they must be so attention starved IRL that they have to bait bloggers to make themselves feel good. ~sigh~
BHJ - I do not HATE you. I was expressing, in my post yesterday, that I was HURT by people that can't seem to find the time to comment on their reader's blogs...even once in a while. I never mentioned the word hate and I do believe that I said that I really like you...just that there is no longer any reciprocation.
If you could find a way to visit your reader's blogs...even every week or two...people might feel better.
What I don’t understand is how someone can come into your “house” so to speak, and just trash you. I am all for discussion and differences of opinion, but voicing your out right hatred of someone for said opinion ON THEIR BLOG is absurd!
I really like the way you write even when I don’t like the topic you are writing about. To me, that is real talent.
I will admit to sometimes enjoying the posts by the haters because it is fun to see how quickly people start in with the verbal bitch slaps….
Oh....and even after my post yesterday....still NO comment from you. I thought that you would at least let me know what happened.
Listen, once you get haters, you are on your way to success. It is a rite of passage, I think. Oh, and it stings, for sure, but I think you just have to figure it's the price of success.
Don't let them bring you down. Keep doing what you're doing, you've got tons of fans, including me. Rock on!
i want to write something here that makes a difference, but im sure everything i want to say has been pretty much covered by the fifty other people before me.
so, hmm.. what they said. :D
(1) MOST HATERS ARE PUSSIES WITH TOO MUCH FREE TIME ON THEIR HANDS. THERE ARE SO MANY COOLER THINGS TO HATE THAN BLOGS, LIKE CROCS OR THE DALLAS COWBOYS!
(2) MOST HATERS ARE JEALOUS OF YOUR TALENT AND TRAFFIC.
(3) IF A GROWN MAN CAN BE SO HURT BECAUSE YOU DON'T COMMENT ON HIS BLOG AS MUCH AS YOU USED TO, HE SHOULD GET A PUSSY CAT. OR A JOB.
DON'T LET THE HATE GET TO YOU. KEEP WRITING.
I USED TO GET TONS OF HATE MAIL. FUNNY HOW PEOPLE DON'T FULLY UNDERSTAND HOW THE INTERNET WORKS AND HOW EASY IT IS TO TRACK PEOPLE DOWN IN REAL LIFE. THAT'S WHY WHENEVER I GOT A REALLY MEAN COMMENT OR A HATEFUL E-MAIL, I'D HAVE MY I.T. GUYS TRACK DOWN A REAL ADDRESS AND SEND THAT PERSON A NICE CARD TO FUCK WITH THEM. ALWAYS FREAKS THEM OUT.
Don't they say any publicity is good publicity?
I read Tent Camper's post yesterday about you, and I kind of agree with him on the no return love thing.
I know it's hard to find time to visit lots of blogs, but it is nice to show a little support to the readers. You do some, with your weekend posts, but really loyal readers (I'm new, so I'm not counting myself) like to hear back from the blogs the enjoy.
The rest of the complaints and hatred I don't get. I don't know why people would hate you. It's an interesting phenomenon, I agree.
Anyone who hates on your blog simply doesn't get the joke. And people who don't get the joke are not people you should give a crap about anyway.
I would never hate on your blog...in fact I LOVE it!
P.S. HOW COME YOU DON'T COMMENT ON MY SITE ANYMORE, BITCH?
No, i's because you got popular. I've thought about this before. They hate that you got attention. I don't know if you've ever heard academics discussing JK Rowling. Nasty. But it's not her fault she got insanely popular. NO, her books are derivative and don't hold up to the hype. But they're good reads and they got non readers reading.
It's not her fault, all the ott popularity and midnight bookstore parties. It's the same as the screaming girls at Beatles concerts. Not their fault.
So I suppose you just have to take the hatred as part of the deal and hope it means you're going to be the new JKR, the next richest woman in Britain.
That's if you don't get to be the next Oprah.
Btw, MY daughter gets night terrors too. The only good advice I've seen is on the dr sears website www.askdrsears.com It's still pretty minimal. Anyone any success stories? Homoeopathy's helped a lot but it still flares up at times.
Maybe if people wrote interesting posts, they'd get more comments from other bloggers. I can tell you from experience that some bloggers who comment on my site have absolutely horrible sites that are so fucking boring there's no way I can come up with a comment other than "Nice post". And I refuse to comment unless I have something interesting to say.
I totally forgot to add, chocolate increases/causes night terrors. My brother is an MD and his daughter gets them. He told me chocolate is a huge factor. Probably not the only one, and he might have told me more, but that's all I remember...
Something chapped my ass in an amazing way yesterday....one commenter gave you shit about writing about the dead and 'surely there are better things to write about'. I clicked through on her link and I'll be damned if the irony didn't just make me want to scream.
In her most recent post, she was writing to her younger self and said in closing, "Don’t ever change who YOU are because of what somebody else thinks of you. OK?"
Stuff like that makes the 'WTF??' sector of my brain wobble. SERIOUSLY, LADY? YOU WERE JUST BOSSING A MAN, ON HIS OWN BLOG, BASED ON YOUR DISTASTE OR WHATEVER. YOU WANTED HIM TO CHANGE TO SUIT YOU.
How silly that someone would think they could --or should even attempt to-- dictate the way someone expresses themselves and/or To Whom they do that expressing.
There's lots more, but fuck just throwing more words into the pile.
"Fuck the naysayers....this is what style we bring." Remember?
dude...i'm with avitable. i kind of wish i had haters ;)
I am not cool enough to have blog haters, though I do have former classmate haters. See I am planning my reunon (that I wasn't even going to attend, the irony) and I got the NASTIEST message through the reunion myspace account and DUDE, I was all like WTF? So I told him to call me and we would talk about it. That guy has no balls. Still haven't heard from him. DOWN WITH HATERS!
As a meditative practice, I sometimes like to revel in the fact that all adults were 4-years-old at some point in their lives. When everyone is four-years-old, we all stand on the same level, care about similar things, have similar immaturities.
Ha, metrodad got shouty.
Jesus, I can't imagine having the stones to assume that because I read someone's blog they should read, let alone comment on mine??
I don't read here as a favour, I read because I like what I read, it makes me think, and laugh, and have that pleasant 'ohhhh I have such a crush on this dude at his computer feeling' :)
So that does me. I think I owe him, not the other way round.
Alright, BHJ...I went through the whole google sign-up thing just so I could leave a comment for you...I've been reading you for the past month (but through the grace of archives, have read you since inception). It may be trite, but "Keep on rockin' in the free world." Original Neil OR even Eddie Vedder...'cause YOU ROCK. It may not take away the sting of the haters, but you gotta know this.
I've had some hateful comments on my site on occasion, not as many as you seem to have had (probably because I'm a better person than you are), but it is mindboggling isn't it?
If you were a rational adult human being and you came across a blog that you had a strong distaste for, wouldn't you just leave and not come back? Why bother with the spiteful comment?
On the other hand I've always wanted to use that line from City Slickers where the one guy yells at his wife "If people were hate, I'd be China!!" Maybe the safest place for me to use that without getting my ass kicked is anonymously from a blog's comments section.
dude I don't hate you or dislike you, but I'm not going to leave my email here either because I don't want your legion of slobbering sycophants to send me annoying e-mails. the nigerians and the erectile dysfunction people keep me deluged as it is.
what I'm going to say here isn't hate, but you may not want to hear it either. all this meta-blogging shit is BORING. why did you even write this post today? so you could be comforted by your fluffers in this annoying echo chamber of BHJ love?
I think I've read here that you fancy yourself a writer. well grow some balls dude! would you whine and cry like a little bitch when the new york times doesn't like your first novel, retreating to rest your head on the heavy laps of your mommyblogger fanbase?
five years ago you would have been called a blog whore. there's nothing wrong with it, but don't think you're blazing new paths here. leaving drive-by comments on shittier blogs to increase your own comments and fanbase and then dropping them when you no longer need them, that's just ancient blog politicking and it has ALWAYS caused animosity and, as you put it, HATE. but it's hate of your own making.
embrace it dude, it's your baby now.
I think your blog precociousness and your lack of any acknowledgment that other people have done what you're doing and worked hard to get where they are combines with your sense of entitlement and personal greatness is also contributing to some of this backlash. especially from those who've been doing this much longer than you who you've "left behind" after relying on them and getting support from them to form a blogging community.
dude, it's just a blog. stop acting like you're changing the world. have some respect for the community you've left behind, or grow some fucking balls (and thicken your skin).
"Thicken your skin?"
That's rich, coming from someone who's hiding behind anonymity.
Pretend I'm Avitable, only with less facial hair, bigger breasts and smaller testicles (I hope) and know that I second his comments.
That fucker keeps taking the words right out of my mouth.
Damn it.
I felt sick reading your post because I left you a comment saying I hated you. But I qualified it as "I hate you because I'm jealous." I admitted it. Like the scruffy snot-nosed boy who pushes the cute girl on the playground (btw, in this scenario you're the cute girl). But now I just feel terrible. I don't want to spread hate or negativity around the blogosphere. I know what it's like to get a negative comment on my blog. I've hid under my covers and still felt naked. I am sorry. I hope that's enough.
Well one thing's for sure...blogging about how people hate you, write you hate mail, post hateful comments, etc ALWAYS drives up the traffic! And it creates a bigger fanbase.
In fact, if someone wrote a book on how to get your blog popular fast, they would definitely have to devote at least one chapter to the subject:
"Haters: You'll have a few, but pretend like you have tons, and talk about it A LOT"
I had an ex-boyfriend tell me once that hate isn't the opposite of love. Apathy is the opposite of love. Hate is actually really close to love.... I'm totally apathetic towards this guy now but he made an interesting point. Maybe the people who say they hate you just hate that they can't be apathetic towards you...... and they don't want to love you.
I don't know, Redneck Mommy, are you sure you have bigger breasts?
Nobody said they hate you, Although I think anonymous is an ass, he is right. I think people feel "dropped" That is the best way to describe it. Not hate. I have had negative comments, shit even someone here said something negative about me. You have to take a dep breath and realize that yea, it's only a blog. Yours, mine everyones.
There is nothing I can say that hasn't already been said better than I could say it.
I read you because I enjoy what you write and the way you write it. If I didn't I wouldn't be here. So keep on doing that voodoo that you do.
Well, I'm pretty sure, Avitable that my boobs are bigger. Or at the very least, prettier with shiny sparkly hoops that make them glitter nicely in the sunshine.
But why don't you send me a pic and we can compare?
(HA! For once I'm asking to see someone's boobs instead of fielding my own boob requests. It's a good day.)
Wink.
I just posted myself naked in a link on Monday's post - wasn't that good enough for you?
This has all been covered by great comments from people who got here before me, but I just want to throw in my 2 cents and show my support.
To anonymous: If you don't like it, don't read it. No one forces you to come here and read this blog, but here you are anyway, which leads me to believe that you are full of crap.
Also, someone hit the nail on the head with tha hate vs. apathy thing. I think they are right on. If someone really didn't like your blog, they would just find something else to read. They hate it because they don't want to admit that they love it.
That hate comes from jealousy and insecurity and childish assholeness. Please don't let it get you down.
And please don't let the nasty blog posts, comments and emails change what you are doing here. I love your skewed reality, it's so different from what everyone else does, that's why I come here.
So keep on keepin' on, BHJ. Because I can't wait to read the tap shoes post.
Aw. I noticed some negativity on your guest post at Redneck Mommy, and I thought it was a little strange. All I can really say is that at least you're popular enough for people to hate you? Because if no one read your blog, no one would really care enough. Especially strangers. So in a way I guess you could decide to take it as a form of flattery. Like psychotic fans who kidnap and murder the object of their affection?
Dude, you don't read my blog and even though I'd love it, I don't mind, because I know you're swimming in more readers and blogs to read every single day since I found your then-little corner store on the Web.
Even if I started to hate or resent you, I would only read as long as I was interested, and I'm still interested. I don't really care if I hate you, and you shouldn't either.
P.S. I don't hate you-- check Yes if you don't hate me, too, then pass it back. If you check No, I will totally tell the teacher you are passing notes in class.
And never forget the Scarecrow, If I only had a brain, when reading peoples like that. So much easier to spew hate than to have enjoyment too some people. But that is history and how progress is mad by someone spewing and others fighting back. It is a cosmic balance.
I hate you because I love you. Chew on that one, brother.
Well I certainly hate you because you promised me a good time with Danny of Dad Gone Mad and I said I'd bring the Oreos.
Never happened.
And here I am, sitting in my kitchen with an unopened bag of Oreos. Rather pathetically, I might add.
It was hard to see your boobs Avitable, with the glare of the giant purple thing winking at me.
On the flip side ... it's a sign you have "arrived" as a well known blogger =)
I've just started reading your blog ... don't change a thing and embrace the hate ... it'll piss them off even more *wink*
i think it's a bastardization of the pack mentality meets the first day of middle school as seen through the eyes of a tabloid editor.
it's vicious. it's pubescent. and it's personal.
however, it gives me great inspiration to see people take the blows and keep on keepin on. besides the fact some of these poisoned words make NO FUCKING SENSE. there is a blog i found where a woman makes cute little bento lunchboxes for her preschooler to help him enjoy eating. and in her comments section, there was an actual argument because one woman decided that she was a horrible mother doing her son a disservice because he was going to grow up feeling entitled and basically turn into an asshole and it would be her own fault. another commenter and she got into it in the comments with name-calling and shit. the owner of the blog allowed the comments but never chimed in which i thought was so mature and said so much without saying anything. it's just an example of how people will hate on the most innocuous shit just to be able to stand on their desk and get noticed.
it just sucks because people always throw down the 'bad parent' card.
makes me want to quit blogging.
Everyone has already said everything, so yeah, me too.
You know you've made it when people hate on you. By that logic, I have yet to make it. I haven't been able to properly inspire any significant amount of hatred from anyone since my high school days. I'm such a failure.
These haters are either a) jealous, or b) bored with nothing better do with their precious time.
Gotta wake up really early to comment around here. Yesterday someone commented that they were disappointed in me and the point of view I explained in my blog. Disappointment is far less devastating than hate, but it surprised me how much it affected me, to know I was no longer liked. Gotta just remember you're here to tell the story and not everyone will like it.
Thanks for reminding me to be kinder to my fellow bloggers though!
It's all about being anonymous. It's amazing what people will say or do if they believe no one is watching or no one will catch them. I sometimes wonder if leaving negative and hateful comments on blogs is a way for some to get rid of all crap that was dumped on them during the day. Kind of a stress reliever?? Maybe somebody should do a research study on the effects of stress levels related to snarky, rude, degrading, and hateful comments left on blogs.
Sending some love your way BHJ! No hatred from my little spot on this planet.
Delurking to say I don't hate you. If I did, I wouldn't read your funny ass, ball rocking blog.
Anonymous is right, except about one thing - BHJ will never have a novel that the New York Times reviews.
Okay, so I'm like comment 100 or something but that's okay. Tent whatever is ridiculous and attention seeking. You don't have to answer to any of your readers. You don't owe anyone anything. If you like a blog comment on it. If you don't or don't have time, pass. Life is too short and we don't get paid for blogging. And to the "anonymous" commentor who didn't want to be held to the wrath of your loyal readers, EXACTLY. You have loyal readers. Why? Because you're a good writer and people want to read you. Not because they owe you for commenting on their blog. You used to comment on every post I wrote for awhile before I ever even visited your blog and saw how great it was. Now you rarely comment on mine and that's because YOU"RE BUSY -- or I suck. Either way, fuck 'em.
I think that you are great and that the anonymous commenter just above me is your other half...not your wife, just the part of you that doesn't want to be self-conscious.
'Course I could be wrong.
But for the sake of conspiracy, I'm going to believe I'm right.
and by "just above," I mean "way above."
said time and time again...fuck 'em
if you were a Mac Truck I would slap a 'keep on bloggin' sticker on your ass.
welcome to the jungle, we've got fun and games.
Wait until the new TV season is in full swing. The haters will crawl back onto their sofas and disappear into the void...
What a twisted compliment, though. You know? They read you, comment, and even write about you.
Why don't they just stop reading? It's only a blog.
Or is it the scorn of unrequited luuuuuv?
Here's the thing...it's not like it's your in-laws, your neighbor or the guy in the cube next to you at work. You don't have to keep coming back. You have the choice to just NOT GO THERE. Do not click on that link, do not return to the site. How farking simple is that?
There, you haters, you have been officially enabled to stop going to sites you don't like, written by people you don't know about things you don't get.
Hate is so excessive, people.
I hate you because you remind me that I can't get by on the looks I don't have but pretend I have to get by.
And for making me want to leave a comment on a post that already has 95! Gah. You suck.
And dude, I've been writing awesome stuff like movie reviews and how awesome I am and I don't think you've left a comment since you called me a pervert. Come on, this stuff is gold. Gold. If you don't leave a comment on my blog soon I'm going to unfollow you on Twitter.
;}
It's probably just a jealousy thing. You get tons of comments, probably have tons of followers and, in general, are just plain "making it" as a successful blogger. Those with less comments, less traffic, etc, probably feel that the universe is treating them unfairly. So, they're taking it out on those more successful, like they have some sort of right to it. I don't believe in that mentality but it's certainly common. News flash, jealous bloggers - nobody owes you anything! You have no right to get pissed off at others for actually being successful.
Well, except me. I have every right to be upset and take it out on everyone. I'm starting with you, BHJ. Then I'm moving along to Bossy. Maybe even Dad Gone Mad. Muahaha...
Ok, not really.
I don't get many comments, btw! Why don't you "drive by" on mine, then I can bitch that you just don't love me as much as I love you! Why, BHJ? WHY? Why don't you love me? Just LOVE ME! *Ahem*
I'm just going to stop typing now. Hold on and I'll back away slowly from my keyboard...
How smart of you to find the perfection in someone hating you. Keep on keepin on, BHJ.
Wow! You have lots of positive comments today!
The blogging world occasionally reminds me of high school. There are the cool kids and the not-cool kids and in this world everyone has a voice and tries to get noticed. It's those who finally have a little power who want to force their opinions on everyone else.
Just like in the real world, you can't make everyone happy and I think if you tried to do that it would strip away the integrity and honesty your blog is all about.
If I was, like , 14 years old and kept a diary (which i did) and someone read my diary (which they did) and made a comment about it (which they did) I would have gone bat shit!
So- now I am 44 years old, and keep a diary (which I do and it's my blog) and someone reads my diary (which they do) and makes a comment (which I hope they do) I am happy about that.
If they don't , so be it.
Nobody is forcing me to read, write, divulge , share, joke or comment about anything. These are not issues of national security - these are just opinions and like assholes, everyone has one.
Baskin Robbins makes 31 flavors. Don't like chocolate? Try the Gold Medal Ribbon (which is to die for by the way)
Keep doing what you're doing BHJ.
Don't worry - Be happy.
BHJ, your blog is an important one among those blogs that I liked so much that they made me want to start a blog of my own. Even though I don't like (or understand?) all of it, I'm in awe - about what's out there. And you contribute your share.
Just so you know.
Unfortunately, I haven't got the time to read even a fraction of the blogs I would like to read regularly. And the time to work on my own newly born blog is even more limited.
But getting hate responses (or worse: being ridiculed!) is one of the things that made me hesitate to start. Being able to chose what I read is treacherous; it lets me forget that there are all kinds of people out there...
Anyway, don't let them get you. The shock will pass and it's your choice who's going to have more impact...
It's not hatred, it's jealousy. Some people mask it through hatred. Let them move on. WHy read if you hate? HAters suck!
BHJ, I don't hate you. I hope you know that.
Also, I love your blog.
I find it priceless that Annonymous tells you to grow some balls but won't leave an email address (I call bs on the desire to avoid spam). He's probably sitting alone in his mom's basement in his underware, smoking camle straights, peeing in a thermous and sucking the filling out of Twinkies while he blathers on.
Don't feed the trolls/haters! You are obligated to no one, however if you're going to pick sides, I recommend the readers and not the trolls. By commenting on, responding to and posting about the trolls/haters just encourages them.
I'd delete their mail and let your ridiculously large collection of avid fans defend you in the comments section.
Peace
Well I'm one of your mommy blogger kiss asses and I am not ashamed to admit it. I think your funny and will continue to come back as long as you are here. I don't care who likes you and who doesn't.
Fuck them all!
Haters means you've made it. Simple as that. I have no haters.
And is Tent Camper serious or is he just trying to get traffic sent his way. Seriously.
I want to send Metrodad a hateful email now so that I can get a card in the mail from him! That would fucking rule.
Well let's start at the top. Let's look at your blog's name. The wind in your vagina??? That is going to spike some people right there - but you know that, it's why you named it that.
BHJ at the end of the day you are writing in your diary and showing it to everyone on the school bus. Some kids will read your diary and piss themselves laughing and you'll make their day, some kids will read your diary and be so incensed that a riot will break out, some kids will not even give a shit about you enough to bother opening the diary let alone read the diary, some kids will read the diary and be so spooked by the truth in there that they will wanna get you thrown out of school so they never have to read that diary again.
The truth hurts BHJ, you are spiking people, shaking them up a little. Who the fuck cares if some people don't want to be spiked, and resist being shaken up and therefore turn their own insecurities into some warped idea of hatred?
You are writing in YOUR diary, say what you want, think what you like but as much as it's not nice to be hated, you know you love it, or you'd stop writing in YOUR diary!
So jealous. I want haters! It means you're doing something right.
I LOVE you man. Take it to the HOLE!!!!!
PS: I *really* do love you. And I *love* the LAKERS (GO KOBE!)!
PSS: Keep the name...Parents in law are ridiculous... but my daughters (one 17 an one 7 call it Ba'gina).
PSS: I LOOOOOVE you, man
Martie of
http://uncontainedchaos.blogspot.com
i hate you because it's easier than loving you.
people hate you? why have i not read of such hatred? omg, are you lying? are you making up the hate? I HATE YOU FOR THAT. ahem. so yeah. people who hate you? lame. who the fuck hates someone they don't even know? oh wait, i do that sometimes. carry on..
I love you. You complete me.
Dude, embrace the hate. And then embrace me. Cause if you don't, I'll say I hate you because you didn't give me a hug.
I'm too lazy to hate you ;)
Oh, that and the fact your blog is awesome. Who knew?
I wonder when I'll get haters...
You can't please everyone all of the time.
Just do what you feel compelled to do and let the negative things die.
The more you comment and complain about it the more responses you will get.
I don't understand all of your blogs but I do read them anyway.
Lets hear more about Jackson and Lucy!!!
Rise above it.. Grampa
Dude. Did your grampa just tell you to brush it off and get back to writing about other stuff?
Because that's kind of awesome.
Also, I don't hate you. I hate Avitable. And everyone else who is asking specifically for haters. Rot in hell, everybody. (You're welcome!)
BHJ, Being hated in the blog world isn't a bad thing. It means a lot of people are reading, which is really good. Those that hate are just assholes that make up a part of the bigger picture. And, yes they probably need more naps.
Your blog still rocks BHJ even if a of people say they hate you. They're still reading aren't they??
You are hilarious. Anybody that thinks otherwise must have plugs up their butt.
Jenny, you get haters too? But you're a cute little ball of awesome!
I sort of hate the black background, but that's because I'm old and it hurts my eyes. And clashes with my aura.
WHOA! Dude, your post just rocked my faith. I just found you, (Black Hockey) Jesus, and now I learn that people hate You. But not me. I read your 100 post last night, and fell in LOVE with you, ala Eddy Murphy's Axel Foley with Judge Reinhold's Billy Rosewood.
I'm pretty astounded when grown people throw around the word 'hate' like a five year old would. Or a teenage girl talking to her Mom. Seriously people, do you really hate someone you've never met before? For stupid reasons? I like reading your blog because it's interesting, creative, different and funny. I wish people would spend their energy doing something POSITIVE with their time, like being creative or promoting a cause they believe in instead of spreading negative emotions.
If you're getting hate mail, it just means you've arrived in the blog world. More readers=more crazies=hate posts/mail.
Wear it like a badge of honour.
Here's trying to make this concise BHJ...you have haters? That's kinda cool, if your looking for readers...I do love however that this post made many lurkers come out of the darkness...perhaps hate promotes commenting...I am amazed that your blog is so big and so many people are talking about it and it's so young! Fabu dude! I mean I'm not amazed, don't get me wrong cuz you're an amazing writer...but...I think I have spoken beyond concise.
I don't mean to sound all preachy, but as a ninth grade English teacher who uses blogs and every scrap of technology available in my classroom, I know what you're talking about. Even though I tell them that I know who is writing and we need to NOT attach other people, I always get a few students who just UNLEASH, usually about me and how stupid I am, like dropped on my head as a baby stupid, to choose (insert title) book!
I think that people find it easier to slice themselves open and show us the beauty/horror/desperation inside if they can do it without looking into our eyes.
It is awful to have those things said to you. And as awful as I feel for you - because it makes you question your remarkable talent - I feel just as bad for them to have all that nasty shit inside, looking for a way out.
LOL I now have The Facts of Life theme song in my head!
Ok, could someone hold my hand while I step off the soapbox so I don't trip and break my neck?
My step daddy always told me "Screw'em if they can't take a joke". I have "friends" if you need anyone "taken care of"...if you"know what I mean"
I don't really like the characterization that if I like your writing then I'm a bootlicker.
Hi. I came over from Tanis's site after you guestposted. I plan to start at your beginning and get current.
I don't do that with many blogs.
And you don't have to come over to mine and comment.
On the hating: I have a touch of the utopian in my soul and I've experienced blogging as a force for Good in the world. It's remarkable,that humans can reach out into the world with our minds and engage with people, empathize and find kindred spirits. Maybe this is as close to telepathic communication as humans will come.
It seems such a waste to spend this potential on being hateful.
On the other hand, if there is a force for Good in reaching out, I suppose there is always the converse, the Shadow side of blogging. The haters.
I like the way you spun gold out of the troll you referenced the other day.
It sucks to feel hatred from some (probably jealous) people.
But, that post about the night terrors---you have to write that---holy cow, we were there, in that black hell, a couple of years ago. My poor ears will never be the same.
I guess I could muster up the energy to hate you but only after I've done more important things like torture dust bunnies, pluck my toe hair and find a new home for my cat that continues to sexually harass me by sticking her ass in my face every! single! day!
Once I get those things done, I could start hating on you.
It's that Palin chick. She's bringing out the hate in bloggers everywhere. Or maybe it's Hannah stirring up tropical blogger depression.
Next week everything will be cool. and nice.
It bums me out that those strange individuals can even be a blip in your radar. They are so not worth it.
My blog, which not many people find worthy of reading, has never sparked any real negative emotion from anyone... but if it did I am guessing I would cry. I know, I just told you they aren't worth it, but hey, we're all human.
I think they're just lonely, bored, damaged people who don't know how else to get attention. Your attention.. imagine that!
Oh yah, and they can't hate you. It's so FREAKIN impossible to hate someone you don't know.
Dude, you have to love the haters like Diddy.
I use the word hate very lightly. I don't hate you though. In fact, because you are hilarious I gave you A Major Award, over at my blog. It even has a cute little button to put on your sidebar.
You aren't responding to my emails so you obviously hate me. So I wrote you another one but it was too long so I turned it into a blog instead.
I don't know why anyone would hate you. I can't figure you out myself. Just go jump on the trampoline and forget about it.
You are entertainment. Very amusing.
Karen
140 comments. Not hated. LOVED. You are totally awesome...and I hate you for it...and I mean that in the NICEST way possible. Dying to link to you, but...I have google ads and have had bad experiences thus far with words like knife yeilding ads for SWORDS with NINJAS. Hello...send help. Would you be terribly offended if I just linked you as Wind? Please let me know, my friends really need to experience The Wind in Their Vaginas...no one should be denied that ever. :)
PS...my daughter calls her lady bits "fur chinas". What the hell.
Wow.. it awes me too, that people would 'hate' someone they don't even know, never met... makes NO sense.
FWIW, the only comment I ever got from you (and it was on my 'other' blog) was wonderful.. and I appreciated it greatly.
I've never had nasty comments on any of my blogs (well, not what I'd consider nasty anyway.. aside from maybe 'Get help.'), perhaps it's because I'm always so nicey-nice. :p
I figure if I'm pissing people off I'm doing something right.
Keep it up.
Everybody is angry. I think it's the Republicans' fault. No, the Democrats. No, wait, all politicians!! And red traffic lights too.
So, like.. did I send you an email saying "I "hate" you because- OMG you're so totally cool!"? Can you just picture me biting my lip and cringing right now?
I'm sooo sorry. It seemed funny at the time but now I remember that I hate it when people say they hate you but disguise it by pretending they're kidding, and that it always feels that way even if they are kidding.
I don't hate you. I think you're a great writer. And I also suspect that you're just a nice person who I'd be friends with if I could figure out where you live.. But don't worry. I won't tell anyone. I wouldn't want to tarnish your image of badassness.
I'm sorry about the real haters. Maybe they're not eating enough chocolate? That always makes me cranky...
Wow, interesting day to come back and see what's happening in the land of BHJ. I don't hate you. You're quite the lovable asshole.
Well, fuck what people say and keep doing your thing.
I like you a lot, although I stopped commenting after I got attacked by some of your other commenters for making a fucking joke on one of your posts. So you have your rabid trigger-happy fans too.
I had someone call me a "bluddy cuntt" among other misspelled insults recently because I pasted my head on a picture of what is apparently some sacred Hindu goddess. They didn't mention that in the Google Image Search.
I like the blog, and I'm like Mikey, I hardly ever like anything. I never, ever read white on black blogs, but I read yours in bloglines, which puts it into black on white. Keep it up.
"I never, ever read white on black blogs,..."
I am always amazed at people like this. Just so... I don't know... insanely pragmatic and practical, or something.
Nothing wrong with it, but it just blows my mind. It reminds me of a friend of mine who said, "I never see movies that are more than an hour and a half. I just can't sit that long." Like the quality of the movie had nothing to do with it. It was all about time.
I just SO don't understand this sort of thing. I'm not criticizing, just observing. It's so alien to me.
Hello again.
I just don't see the point of negative comments. Simply click out. It's like hitting the delete key when your old college chum sends you the stupid Allie McBeal dancing baby video for the 100th time. So not worth the time. Those negative comments leavers need a life. Or they need to get laid.
Hey Scott, commenter above - honestly, I don't read them either as a rule, except for this one of course, because the white on black hurts my eyes. When I look away from the screen I see black with little while lines across it for a while afterward, like when you stare at the sun too long, you know? It blinds me for like half an hour. But Black Hockey Jesus? What other color could his background be? Anything else would be wrong. Maybe that's what the queen up there is talking about? I willingly suffer for BHJ.
In general, I hate people. This doesn't mean I'd tell them to their face or to their blog. Overt hating is just plain annoying.
With love and admiration comes hatred. You know the phrase "haters." You are going to have those. Since I started reading you your blog has literally exploded.
I miss the intimacy and thus I don't come by as frequently but I am still a fan.
Congratulations on your success.
Let me just say:
1) I'm obviously a loser since I have nothing better to do that comment about comments.
2) There is no spite in this, just a laughing observation. What I'm observing is a common thing and I'm not belittling anyone.
"Since I started reading you your blog has literally exploded."
It has literally exploded. Literally. Not figuratively. It has literally exploded.
I've been thinking lately that people use the word literally when they don't mean literally. They use the word literally figuratively. It seems like, if any word should be used literally, the word "literally" should be used literally. If we continue to use the word literally figuratively, then what word will mean literally?
This literally kills me. Literally.
Hello again.
Kind of ties in with something I said on my post the other day. While I like to get comments, and I send personal thanks and replies to commentors when I can, at the end of the day the only person I write for is myself. One of my creative writing profs used to tell us: "Don't try to find an audience. Let them find you."
People hate you because you never comment on their blog? How many blogs are out there? Maybe you should just spam-comment the entire internet. I bet they'd still whine.
Toot toot!
Dude - it's not you.
They don't hate you - no matter what they say.
They "hate" some caricature they read about on the Internet. In the same way I *hate* that bitchy chic on All My Children.
I think if you are going to stay on the Internet for any length of time, eventually you have to come to terms with that.
am I mistaken, or did BHJ not whine like a petulant little bitch when girls gone child didn't come comment on his blog after he'd left her some comments?
I'm sure he'll say he was "just kidding." just like me, right now. I'm just kidding, BHJ! You're such a great writer I'm sure David Foster Wallace is running for the hills!
Well, man, when your journal has Superpowers and Cosmic Karma Connections and Magical Pigeons whatnot, it is inherently true that some Lex Luthor is gonna come along bearing her/his own pathetic version of kryptonite.
And I was 'round when [Black Hockey] Jesus Christ had his moment of doubt and shame.
Pleased to meet you.
Yeah, long memory, BHJ's Cynical Dad guest post and tentcamper's post are pretty much the exact same thing. Good point!
"Life is too short and we don't get paid for blogging."
Right, and we sure don't get paid for commenting, much less for reading. There are so many good blogs that nobody has time to read them all. Since a reader will find more all the time, it is inevitable that some you originally commented on will have had to drop off your list after you found ones you liked even better, but don't have time for them all. So, yeah, they are correct to "take it personal" and correct to view it as a somewhat negative "opinion" if a regular commenter quits commenting, but I don't think anyone should get all worked up about it -- grow up, being liked LESS than others is still not being "NOT liked".
Dear ANONYMOUS:
Whoa! What's with all of the Aunt Fran-ing? I mean, what's all of this mutual obligation junk?
Read if you want; don't if you don't.
We electricity journalers shouldn't get all tear-eyed because of lack of comment / reading receprocity.
Booooo! Waaah! No one ever visits. You never call. You never write letters anymore. And all I do is give, give, give.
When people make me feel like I HAVE to see (read) them, I really don't WANT to see (read) them.
Just in case the readers are reading my previous comment about Aunt Fran-ing:
I was addressing the Anonymous of the "slobbering sycophants," and not the Anonymous who posted thirty minutes before me. Right above me. No, that Anonymous and I said just about the same thing. YARK!
Also. Reciprocity is spelled with an i, not an e.
I will kindly pay you Tuesday for a hamburger today!
I discovered your blog when you guest posted on redneck mommy. My 2c. Haters = popular. So it's a good thing (if somewhat annoying). I've never been hated on my own blog, it's too small. But I have been hated when featured prominently on a big popular blog.
Also, this thing about pretending you read your commenters blogs. Or whatever the fuck that is. I don't get that. I red blogs that interest me. Ill be buggered sideways if I'm going to read blogs because someone reads mine, comments and then expects me to read theirs. Fuck that. And it's even less feasible on a popular blog with lot's of comments (and haters).
Don't let the haters under your skin. Not worth the emotional energy.
I just wanted to stop by again to tell you I'm sorry. I commented on TC's post agreeing with him. I didn't mean to be mean or hurtful. I'm just terribly blunt. Terribly-terribly. Also, I commented on your post over on Redneck Mommy. I think maybe that one could've come off as trolly, but I didn't mean it to. I just meant I understand you a little better now.
It does confuse me to read a post and not be sure if you made it up or what. I think that's what keeps people interested in you, though.
I'm *not* bitter that you've grown so quickly. I'm happy for you, and I wonder how you did it. I even try to emulate a few things I now you've done.
I didn't take the time to read all the comments, because I need to go get the baby to sleep. However, I really hope I'm not the only one who stopped by to apologize. Keep doing what you do, and good luck.
Also, again, I'm sorry!
Hate you? WTF? Don't get it.
I am obsessed with your blog. Love your writing..Oops. Oh shit, did I just write and say that out loud? Yeah, I do hate you..uh, yeah, hate you a lot.
BHJ, 6-30-2008:
"I read all those popular blogs and tried to make funny or intelligent comments on their posts, hoping they would check me out and like what they found. My first big break was when Baby On Bored liked my post about the Fat Bald Retarded Kid and mentioned me in her blog. Then Jenny The Bloggess mentioned me on Twitter and put me in The Houston Chronicle 3 times. The only reason anybody reads me is because of Baby On Bored and Jenny The Bloggess. They completely rule the universe. . .
. . .for the most part it's been very warm and hospitable. I already mentioned Baby On Bored & The Bloggess. Metrodad's offered me some awesome support. i am Bossy stopped by and commented. You put me on your page as your Current Infatuation. Tons and tons of people, too many to mention, have been super nice to me. Sadly though, I think it's the nature of the writer's frail ego to dwell on the negative. And no matter how many cartwheels or triple lutzes I pull off, I simply can't get Girl's Gone Child or Dad Gone Mad to acknowledge my existence. I have come to imagine them as my neglectful blogger parents. They're always too busy to pay attention to me. . ."
Hi Anonymous!
I'm assuming you have a point?
It looks to me like you left off the part where I then wrote a nasty post about what a cunt GGC is, where I attacked her writing, where I speculated on her ego, etc.
O that's right. You didn't forget that part because I never did it. I never attacked GGC. Ask her. She sent me an email that said I was "cute" and "funny as hell". Do you think tentcamper deserves an email from me that says he's "cute" and "funny as hell"?
Probably not because our posts are apples & oranges.
So I'm still looking for your point. Maybe it's the fact that I commented on other people's blogs with the hope that they'd come see mine?
Well, I stand by that practice. And?
What?
Throw a tantrum if it doesn't work? I didn't say that. In fact, if it doesn't work, you should write a post like I wrote (the one you quoted) because that DID work. Tentcamper's rant didn't work. Are you still acting like there's no difference?
Because I still can't find your point. You merely quoted me all self-satisfied like you won a fucking lawsuit, Tom Cruise.
I can't find the part where I condone writing hateful mean shit and crying like a little bitch. You left off the part where I was going to develop an addiction to hard drugs and audition for porn.
Really? You wanna take that for literal? Are we living by exact words, Greg Brady? Is that your point? BHJ saying he was going to audition for porn was the SAME THING as tentcamper's attack.
I guess we'd need to know if GGC and Dad Gone Mad felt attacked. And I think we know the answer.
Well, tentcamper (who the fuck else is reading this old shit?), I did read your blog, I commented on your blog, and it didn't maintain my interest. I keep 60 people in my reader because that's all I can handle. You used to be in it. Now you're not.
Should I be sorry? Because I'm not. We could've settled this shit with a simple email, but instead you pulled that shit to generate some traffic and buzz. Congratulations.
They're looking. Now you just have to keep them there.
oops... I'm guilty of reading this old shit... That's because I'm a fan of good writing....
And I would do anything for love
I'd run right into hell and back
I would do anything for love
Anything you've been dreaming of
But I just won't do that....
What is THAT, anyway?
Rats! I screwed up again! Bad songs by Meatloaf belong on the comments for that other old post!
Damn my feeble mind!
Keep on keeping on, my friend!
Anonymity leads to dichotomy.
Black or white, no patience for nuance.
A false bravado bred from a false sense of security.
They don't know about google street view.
I just spent half an hour reading through this, and all the comments, and I still can't decide if I'm depressed or proud to be a part of this racket/phenomenon.
I'm glad you are, though.
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