Lucy, however, woke up at 6:41 and dressed herself.
Lucy rocks to her own tunes. Rock on Lucy.Esmerelda was working today so, because she’s so touchy about me leaving Lucy home alone, I needed to pump up the tires on the running stroller. Wives come with a lot of rules. Pushing that stroller’s a bitch; don’t underestimate how much your swinging arms help you when you're running.
Note To Single Dads: When you’re running with your 9-year-old son while pushing your 4-year-old daughter in a stroller, the ladies shoot you all kinds of love beams. Big smiles. Pockets full of digits. Lace up those shoes.
Heard on the run…
JACKSON: Dad? Is this quality time?
BLACK HOCKEY JESUS: Hells yeah!
I’ve read a lot of parenting blogs about the evils of swearing in front of the kids. Well my kids hear all kinds of shit. I’ve kicked smoking and drinking and most of the best prescription drugs and now the doctor’s stealing all the good food. I’ll be damned if I’m gonna watch my fucking mouth. Plus I think my using language has pushed Jackson to the opposite extreme. I think he’ll wind up Alex P. Keaton just to spite me. He absolutely will not curse and he doesn’t think it’s funny, which is probably why the boys throw rocks at him. Loosen up Jackson. Drop an F-Bomb. Have a smoke. Do something. Lucy, on the other hand, is wicked to her core but that’s not my fault. I don’t subscribe to our culture’s emphasis on the monstrous impact of the parent on the child. Sue me. There are ways in which we’re fated.
BHJ: How’re you doing, Lucy?
Today marks the first day I called my daughter by her blog name: Lucy. There are several perspectives from which to view this event. I prefer to see it as my extreme commitment to my work.
Jackson clocked a blistering 10:51 mile today. I was so proud of him. We’re gonna stick with the mile for a week, but our goal is to eventually bust out 30 minutes a day all summer. Then we’re going to enter a 5k and do it sub-30 minutes together and slay all the world's bullies.
I leave you today with a picture of all 3 of us on the first day of Summer Vacation. We’re going to the pool while Esmerelda provides the fiscal foundation for our carefree lives.
Now the world don't move to the beat of just one drum!
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16 comments:
Have you considered investing in some sunsceen for your children? And some moisturizer for yourself?
I admire your running passion. I'm proud to say that I completed the Austin half a few years ago. Completed it. That's all I have to say.
Running. Outside. Not for me. Since the temperatures here are approaching those on the sun, I get my heat-averse ass on the step machine in the comfort of my air conditioned bedroom.
I see you only apply the sunscreen to yourself you selfish, foul mouthed bastard!
There is no fucking reason to fucking run unless you are being chased in the forest by a fucking wild animal. And you shouldn't be in the fucking forest in the first fucking place with small children.
Blog name! That's a good idea I hadn't thought of.
Also running, yikes.
(I'm going to remember this chores in the morning plan...... Unfortunately I think it would backfire and work on my husband.)
Hmmm... I think I'll do "no fun until you stop drooling" for my kid. Although he does love it when I chase him so that might be something to get us both in shape, though since he just made it up into percentile 2 for the first time in his 2 years of life weight wise, I like to teach him to be as big of a couch potato as possible.
And since I know where you really live, I am even MORE in awe of the fact that you fucking run. Outside. Crap. Now I'm feeling like shit. Oh well. Guess I won't be around to read your blog anymore. Goodbye, cruel world.
when i was a worked for money, i had a 5 foot tall blonde swedish nanny. she had a 3 1/2 foot tall very dark brown son only a few months older thant my daughte. you cannot imagine the looks they got when they went out running in the double jogger.
My five year old has those SAME TIGHTS. The Texas heat will not defeat her from wearing them with cowgirl boots and a Hawaiian print dress. Rock on indeed.
I used to run religiously. And by that I mean, praying the whole way. I hated it and yet, forced myself to do it. But then, an angel came down and told me there's a beautiful place with TV's and Ipods. A place you can exercise while reading a magazine. it's called a gym. I lost weight, toned up and didn't have to leave the beauty of the indoors. But that's just me. I'm really smart.
Ha, when my boys slept in like that, they would wake up visibly taller. Watch out.
Once again BHJ you make me laugh. Don't get heatstroke eh. :)
About once I month I get on this kick where I tell the huz we have to stop with the f-bombs etc in front of the kids and I totally mean it — good intentions and all that. But it never FUCKING lasts. We're doomed to have junior pottymouths, I guess. *sigh*
Ok, BHJ, you fucking ROCK.
I couldn't get my four year old into a jog stroller, much less push her a mile (she weighs as much as my seven year old, if that matters), so hells yeah it's hard.
Get on with your bad self.
I love Lucy. And you are not too shabby either...
Why is it now all I can think about is parasailing with my vagina?
dude- i was apping my little down arrow key repeatedly whilst reading and almost shit myself when mr. drummond, willis, and little arnold popped up!
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